K was born in October 1999..
It was anything but a typical birth. He is my second wife and Is 3rd child. The previous two were boys and both deliveries went quite smoothly. In fact our second son almost arrived in the hospital car park he was that keen to come into the world.
K was very different. To begin with he was almost a week overdue and my poor wife was as "big as a house". She had suffered very badly from fluid retention around the ankles and had had gestational diabetes during the pregnancy.
When it finally came time for K to arrive he was far more stubborn than his older brothers. Firstly the sac surrounding him refused to break. The pressure of him trying to arrive before the sac had broken caused it to blow up in a bubble that eventually burst like a pricked water balloon spraying all over the bed as it did. My wife I think nearly feinted. She said later that the force had been that great she thought that K may have came out with the sac.
At this stage the midwife had a foetal monitor permanently attached around my wife's stomach. I am guessing that, though they were not telling us, they may have been a little concerned and what they were seeing on the monitors as they kept it in place right through the delivery. K's heart appeared to beat strongly throughout. Even as I could see his head coming into the world. Then I saw every parent's worst nightmare. He was as black as the ace of spades. He had entered the world but looked like nothing more than a dark bowl of jelly. He had stopped breathing.
It was a chaotic scene. My wife was yelling out "is he ok?" because she couldn't hear him crying. I am standing there reassuring her that he is fine. "Everything is great" I am telling her while watching the mid wife working frantically trying to breathe life into him and thinking that it looked like a lost cause. Miraculously after what was probably a few seconds but seemed to be about 5 hours he let out a scream. I can tell you that I have never been so relieved to hear a baby cry in my life. The midwife had just saved a life and spare a thought for the poor trainee she had with her. This was Michelle's first birthing experience. We ran into her about a month later in the shopping centre and when she saw how healthy K looked she just stood there and cried. She could not believe he had survived.
K went off to a humidy crib for the next month. I think the doctors told us about every second day that he wasn't showing any positive signs and that we should prepare ourselves for the prospect of him never going home. We now believe that he wasn't showing any visible improvement because of what we now know is Autism. 11 Years later he is the biggest kid in his class.
For mine. I to this day believe that his dying at birth is what caused his Autism but maybe that is just me wanting something to blame for what he has to go through.
Let's Talk About Autism!!
Tuesday, 14 September 2010
Autism and my son "K"
11 years ago a very special young boy was born in the Gold Coast hospital in Queensland, Australia. He is our middle son and he has Autism. His name is Keiran but I know him as "K" for reasons that I will outline along the way.
I have decided to take the time to write this blog in the hope that it helps the general public learn a little more about Autism and how it effects not only those diagnosed with Autism but also the extended family. It also maybe useful to others with a family member that is autistic.
The blog will outline events along the road in K's life. How we handled those events. Some well and some not so well.
K is high functioning autistic. His main problem in life, apart from the obvious , is his inability to interact well with others. Something that is most prevalent in autistic children. He is currently in Grade 5 at school and has 2 years before he has to leave primary(junior) school and go to the totally new environs of high school. That day frightens the hell out of me. I know in my heart that my little man will simply not cope with a "normal" high school at all no matter how well prepared we have him and unfortunately, in "the lucky country" that is Australia, there is no such thing as a high school for Autistic children. There are some great organisations and in later posts I will take the time to outline a few so that others may benefit from their help if needed.
From reading other people's Autism stories and blogs I know that, as far as having a child effected by autism goes, we are very lucky. K in a lot of respects would appear to be very "normal" for want of a better word.
Until K was diagnosed with Autism we knew nothing about it. Though that swiftly changed. What we did find though, and have continued to notice, is the genuine lack of understanding of Autism in our country. As well as the lack of a pathway for parents who find themselves with a child diagnosed with Autism. If your child has cancer or diabetes or any of the more common or widely acknowledged illnesses your local doctor can usually point you in the right direction of assistance.
On a personal note I am quite lucky in that I work for myself so am able to take the necessary time to assist K when needed. In the past few months K has become quite irritable and is constantly complaining of being unloved and hating everyone. That is most definitely not the case. He is quite possibly the most beautiful and precious human being on this planet, but it breaks my heart to not be able to snap my fingers and fix this autism problem for him.
What I can do for him though, and other parents and sufferers of Autism in this country, is to jump up and down until Autism has a very loud voice in this country and politicians and media take notice of Autism. I have a firm belief that Autism lags behind other illnesses with respect to support because it isn't a killer(thankfully). Everyone, myself included is horrified by childhood cancer and the like yet Autism appears to be a safer disease so garners less "respect" as an illness.
The first step for me is, through my own company if necessary, to ensure that when the 2013 school year rolls around my son has a specialist Autism high school to attend. Even if I do have to build it and fund it myself. That is a promise I make to him this very day.
I, in fact, hope to have it up and running for the 2012 school year. With any luck I will have a parcel of land secured by the end of January 2011. I will use this blog to keep everyone updated.
This first post has been a little rambling and I apologise for that. I will endeavour to be more succinct in future. However, I do find that I have so much to say that I just want to spit it all out at once.
Perhaps this blog helps me as much as it helps anyone else in getting things off my chest.
Please feel free at anytime to offer suggestions or criticisms. I have very broad shoulders and most definitely do not claim to have all the answers. What I do have is a determination to make this country a better place for sufferers of Autism.
Let's force people to pay attention.
"Let's Talk About Autism"
I
I have decided to take the time to write this blog in the hope that it helps the general public learn a little more about Autism and how it effects not only those diagnosed with Autism but also the extended family. It also maybe useful to others with a family member that is autistic.
The blog will outline events along the road in K's life. How we handled those events. Some well and some not so well.
K is high functioning autistic. His main problem in life, apart from the obvious , is his inability to interact well with others. Something that is most prevalent in autistic children. He is currently in Grade 5 at school and has 2 years before he has to leave primary(junior) school and go to the totally new environs of high school. That day frightens the hell out of me. I know in my heart that my little man will simply not cope with a "normal" high school at all no matter how well prepared we have him and unfortunately, in "the lucky country" that is Australia, there is no such thing as a high school for Autistic children. There are some great organisations and in later posts I will take the time to outline a few so that others may benefit from their help if needed.
From reading other people's Autism stories and blogs I know that, as far as having a child effected by autism goes, we are very lucky. K in a lot of respects would appear to be very "normal" for want of a better word.
Until K was diagnosed with Autism we knew nothing about it. Though that swiftly changed. What we did find though, and have continued to notice, is the genuine lack of understanding of Autism in our country. As well as the lack of a pathway for parents who find themselves with a child diagnosed with Autism. If your child has cancer or diabetes or any of the more common or widely acknowledged illnesses your local doctor can usually point you in the right direction of assistance.
On a personal note I am quite lucky in that I work for myself so am able to take the necessary time to assist K when needed. In the past few months K has become quite irritable and is constantly complaining of being unloved and hating everyone. That is most definitely not the case. He is quite possibly the most beautiful and precious human being on this planet, but it breaks my heart to not be able to snap my fingers and fix this autism problem for him.
What I can do for him though, and other parents and sufferers of Autism in this country, is to jump up and down until Autism has a very loud voice in this country and politicians and media take notice of Autism. I have a firm belief that Autism lags behind other illnesses with respect to support because it isn't a killer(thankfully). Everyone, myself included is horrified by childhood cancer and the like yet Autism appears to be a safer disease so garners less "respect" as an illness.
The first step for me is, through my own company if necessary, to ensure that when the 2013 school year rolls around my son has a specialist Autism high school to attend. Even if I do have to build it and fund it myself. That is a promise I make to him this very day.
I, in fact, hope to have it up and running for the 2012 school year. With any luck I will have a parcel of land secured by the end of January 2011. I will use this blog to keep everyone updated.
This first post has been a little rambling and I apologise for that. I will endeavour to be more succinct in future. However, I do find that I have so much to say that I just want to spit it all out at once.
Perhaps this blog helps me as much as it helps anyone else in getting things off my chest.
Please feel free at anytime to offer suggestions or criticisms. I have very broad shoulders and most definitely do not claim to have all the answers. What I do have is a determination to make this country a better place for sufferers of Autism.
Let's force people to pay attention.
"Let's Talk About Autism"
I
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